Shut Up Iris

Well, now I hate Overstock.com, I bet none of you saw that coming. You didn't see that coming because none of you actually know me, or make any attempt to REALLY get to know me! However let's leave my psychological trauma aside while I spin a little yarn I call 'Overstock.com has issues with comprehension.'

Now, I have used Overstock.com several times and always it went like this: I plan something I want to buy, find it, confirm it is in stock and order it before 9 in the am. Overstock.com charges me, the order ships that afternoon and 2-3 days later I have the item or items. I have only once had to return something, it was pants, made by the chinese that they hilariously switched the waist size with the leg length, comedy ensued. On the return I read the overstock policy on returns, followed it to the letter and received a full refund. No sweat.



So anyhow last Friday at about 7:30 in the am I placed an order for some kitchen stuff in anticipation of Thanksgiving, a rotisserie, roasting pan and griddle. By Friday at 3 in the pm the griddle had shipped, what? The other items you may ask? Processing. Items that were supposedly in stock and ready for immediate delivery were doing something called processing. This meant that the roasting pan and rotisserie had no way in hell of reaching me before thanksgiving. So I pondered, what would one do?

I decided to cancel the order, so I read the Overstock.com cancellation policy and found that processed and shipped items could not be canceled, but that I could cancel items that had neither processed or shipped. 'Wonderful!' I thought 'My order status shows 'processing' so it is neither processed or shipped!', so I logged in but, uh, the 'cancel' check box that Overstock.com's return policy and instructions said to use was not on the two processing items. So what did I do? I made a huge mistake and contacted Overstock.com's customer service.



Fuck, talk about a lesson in retardedness. I carefully explained the issue to the customer service specialist and was told that 'Shipped items and orders sent to the warehouse could not be refunded.', so I copied and pasted the exact Overstock.com policy on cancellations that only mentioned 'processed' and 'shipped' orders. I then had it politely explained that 'processing'(what my order was doing) actually meant 'processed' and I could not cancel it.

Wait, what? Here let me explain how Overstock.com's cancellation policy works: Orders when placed, are immediately listed as 'processing', now you can cancel any order that has not processed or shipped, however please keep in mind that 'processing' in the mind of Overstock.com does not mean 'Processing-in the act of moving along in a process, what I would assume is preparing to ship the order' but ACTUALLY means 'Processed- finished, the process of shipping the order is done.'

So what happened to my order? Overstock.com assured me that they would try to cancel my 'processed' order, you know the order that was shown on their website as 'processing' and therefore according to their policy cancelable. So what happened? Friday Saturday and Sunday - no cancellation, order still 'processing' according to Overstock.com. Monday morning, I contacted them again, and was given the same routine, by Monday night? Still processing. Tuesday morning? Shipped.

So, the Overstock.com order progression goes: processing, shipped. At no time was the order shown as processed. Now you may have noticed that this directly contradicts their stated policy , well, according to Overstock.com it doesn't. Here is how it was explained to me: Overstock.com can cancel any order that has not been processed or shipped, by processed the explicitly mean 'sent to the warehouse for fulfillment' and that on your 'my orders' page 'processing' means 'processed-sent to warehouse for fulfillment' which they then apologized for it being so confusing, and of course they made no apology that they have in fact designed their system so that orders may only be canceled immediately after the order is placed, my order was doomed because I had waited to see if it would ship.

There are several lessons here.

First: In stock items that are ready to ship at Overstock.com, may or may not ship. Which really isn't a problem, except-

Second: Overstock.com has written a purposefully confusing cancellation policy, so much so that their customer service reps actually feel the need to apologize for it.

Third: Overstock.com has set up the 'order status' on the Order Information page to purposefully confuse the order process or in this case the order processing, I believe it is designed to create that few hours of hesitation that makes it impossible to cancel your order.

Fourth: Even when giving them FOUR DAYS for a 'Customer Care' specialist to cancel your order, they still will not do it, but they will e-mail you an apology, apologizing for their 'confusing shipping status' and convoluted cancellation policy.

Fifth: I will never use Overstock.com again.

Maybe I'm overreacting? Should a company be held to it's own stated policies? Should Overstock.com be forgiven for their inability comprehend their policy and order status? I mean they did created the process, oops, I mean they did create the processing so why shouldn't they be able to interpret it any way they like?

Well, they can, but fuck them I have the right to call them on their bullshit and not shop there ever again, and I hope someone reading this will learn something.